「如果放在今天，我的領養申請都不會被批准。但母親給中國政府寫了封信，充分說明了一個四肢癱瘓的男人也可以成為好父親理由，然後領養申請就被接受了。
我從小就知道這個故事。父親24歲時出了一場嚴重的車禍。母親在重症監護室做護士時認識了他。她說她最先注意到的是他的冷靜。大部分人在聽到自己以後再也不能走路時會大哭——但父親卻默不作聲。我記憶里他一直都是這樣的，特別冷靜和清醒。他的教育方式是『袖手旁觀』，他沒有別的選擇，只能用語言來引導我。
我該學走路時，他就說：『站起來走走，小公主。』然後我就乖乖的照做了。我騎單車是他通過解釋單車的物理原理教會的。後來我的問題變得更複雜了，但他總是以他同樣的方式陪伴着我。如果我因為考試驚慌失措，他就會跟我賭一美元，說我能通過。這都成了我們的規律。每當我心裏沒底時，他就跟我賭一美元。
隨着我的焦慮越來越嚴重，他又學了心理學。他會跟我講應對策略，會說類似這樣的話：『你是不是太往壞處想了？』『你以前掛過科嗎？』『你有什麼證據證明這次會跟一起不一樣嗎？』我不喜歡太情緒化。我不希望讓他覺得自己是使我心情煩躁的原因。如果他都能適應四肢癱瘓的生活，為什麼我就不能適應做一個四肢癱瘓的人的女兒呢？可是真的太難了。
我從很小的時候，就得幫他做許多事。而我又很內向。我跟別人看起來也不一樣。這讓我壓力很大。但他為我做了他所能做的一切。用他唯一知道的方法——鼓勵我，信任我。
2017年8月，他開始病得很重。是某種癌症，但我們都沒檢查清楚。因為我們知道他撐不過化療。在他最後的日子裏，我坐在他床邊，填着我的法學院申請表。當然我也很心慌。我確信自己不會被任何一所學校錄取。但他一直安慰我。結果證明他是對的。雖然他沒撐到出結果的時候，但他就是知道。『我跟你賭一美元，』他對我說。」
「The adoption wouldn’t even have gotten approved today. But Mom wrote a letter to the Chinese government explaining why a quadriplegic man could be a good father, and the application was accepted. I』ve known the story my entire life. Dad got in a bad car accident when he was twenty-four. And Mom met him while working as a nurse in the ICU. She said his calmness was the first thing she noticed. Most people cry when they’re told they』ll never walk again—but Dad was silent. He was like that my entire life. So calm and level-headed. His parenting style was to『sit back and watch.』 He had no other choice. He could only guide me with his words. When it was time for me to walk, he just said:『Stand up and walk, Princess.』 And I did. He taught me to ride a bike by explaining the physics of it. My problems eventually became more complex, but he was always there in his same way. If I was panicking over a test, he』d bet me a dollar that I could pass it. That became our thing. Whenever I was feeling unsure, he』d bet me a dollar. As my anxiety got worse, he studied psychology. He』d walk me through coping strategies. He』d say things like:『Are you catastrophizing this?』,『Have you ever failed a class before?』,『What evidence do you have that this time will be different?』 I hated being the emotional one. I never wanted him to feel like the reason I was messed up. If he could handle being a quadriplegic, why couldn’t I cope with being the daughter of one? But it was so hard. From a young age, I had to help him with so much. And I was such as shy kid. I looked different than everyone else. It was a lot of stress. But he did everything he could for me. In the only way he knew how— by encouraging me, and believing in me. He started getting really sick in August of2017. It was some kind of cancer, but we didn’t even get it checked. Because we knew he couldn’t survive the chemo. I sat at the foot of his bed during his final days, filling out my law school applications. Of course I was panicking. I was convinced that I wouldn’t get accepted anywhere. But he kept reassuring me. And he was right. Even if he didn’t live to see the results, he knew.『I』ll bet you a dollar,』 he told me.」
